Public Service Announcement: The high measles rate and your misguided fears.

America, I’m not entirely sure who among you are the dim-witted souls not vaccinating your children, but according to the most recent CDC report you have philosophical and/or religious fears. Please take this personally: you are idiots.

It is every parent’s social responsibility to vaccinate their children not only for little Johnny’s good, but for the good of his neighbor. The benefits of vaccination outweigh all associated risks.

So as far as your fears go, let me be absolutely clear: If by some chance your un-vaccinated hell spawn child infects one of my sons, I will hunt you down and make you wish you had never been born.